I have to confess that I haven’t had much motivation to write lately! Nothing interesting is going on- Candy is learning that two point does not equal galloping time, Moe is dressaging with the lesson children (that superstar scored a 64% on his Training 2 test with his young rider this weekend), and Gina is growing the embryo and being ridden by my friend Holly. Johnny and I made some progress in the barn over the weekend, and I’m excited to share the revamped tack room with y’all soon!
In the mean time, I’m loving everyone’s take on these questions from Allie of Rocking E Cowgirl!
1. What is your earliest, clearest horse memory?
My earliest horse memory that I know is a memory and not something my mind fabricated from hearing stories about it is riding a docile chestnut lesson pony named Red at the barn where I took riding lessons when I was a small child. I remember Red’s bright, shaggy coat, the tiny western saddle I rode in, and concentrating very hard on keeping Red trotting. I was probably about 4 years old at this time.
2. Describe the perfect summer day.
It’s a slightly overcast day with a pleasant breeze (instead of the gale-force winds my part of Oklahoma’s been experiencing for the last week), and I’m going trail riding on Gina at Oologah Lake with a group of friends. It’s hot enough to go swimming, but not hot enough to make me consider moving to the northeast. I don’t get sunburned. After riding and swimming, I head home and take a luxurious nap before grilling dinner and watching the sunset from the front porch. No animals poop or throw up in the house, the horses don’t try to kill each other at dinner time, and someone else cleans the litter boxes.
3. Are you reading anything right now? Tell me about it!
I just finished reading The Delmarva Conspiracy , a children’s book that was laying around work. This is the weirdest fucking book I’ve ever read. It has everything: a plucky young farm boy, some horses, a band of truckers, recurring nightmares, and a neo-Nazi conspiracy that’s infiltrated the government. You know, normal kids stuff.
4. Do you follow a celebrity (horsey or non) that you’re embarrassed to say fascinates you? Tell me. NOW.
Not really? I follow a lot of food-related people (like Ina Garten and Kevin Belton), a handful of sports-related people (mostly NBA players), and a couple of music-related (okay, so just Killer Mike and El-P) people on social media, but I wouldn’t say any of them are particularly fascinating to me. Well. Tony Allen of the Memphis Grizzlies is kind of fascinating, but he doesn’t tweet much any more, so my interest level has decreased.
5. What is your single most biggest horsey dream or goal?
My ultimate dream is to compete (and complete!) at Rolex. As you can tell, I’m making lots of progress to that end, what with my elderly horses and lack of lessons and living in Oklahoma.
6. If you were at Starbucks right now, what would you order?
Right this minute? Trenta iced green tea, no sweetener. I pass a Starbucks every time I drive to work, and my usual morning order is a grande americano with an extra shot of espresso. But I try not to drink coffee after 11 AM.
7. What is your biggest equine pet peeve?
When sweat marks are left on my horses. Or when my tack is put away in some weird way. I don’t mind loaning Gina and Moe and their equipment to the lesson kids, but it drives me insane when I can see girth marks or the imprint of a saddle pad on one of the horses. I go equally nuclear when my bridles are hung up by the browbands or my girth is laying on the floor.
8. With everything going on politically and in the media, tell me, do you follow it religiously? Tune it out? Or something in between?
I’ve been writing strongly worded letters to my elected representatives for years; Oklahoma legislators have heard from me on topics ranging from midwifery to toll roads to teacher pay to how if someone suggests putting the Ten Commandments at the State Capitol one more fucking time, I am going to personally fund a Flying Spaghetti Monster statue. I try to stay up-to-date on current issues via NPR and other reliable news sources. I’ve had to take a break, though, because when NPR begins to sound like The Onion, I can feel my blood pressure rise.
9. If you had to show your horse to a song, what would you choose?
Timely question! My dressage club created recently a year end award specifically to promote musical freestyle performances, so I’ve been toying with the idea of putting together something to do on Moe. (Hey, there’s a cash prize!) Because First Level freestyles are ultra-boring, the music would have to be at least kind of exciting. For trot work, maybe Killer Mike’s “R.A.P. Music” or “Blockbuster Night Part 1” by Run The Jewels, and “Da Rockwilder” by Method Man & Redman and/or “Bring ‘Em Out” by T.I. for canter work.
10. What are you most looking forward to this summer?
Trail riding! That’s easily my favorite part of summer!